Why does the Bride Do That?

One of the most common issues I run into with Wedding Vendors is the issue of emailing you for pricing and after you respond, she hides from you. I call this little game “Bride and go Seek”. She seems sincerely interested in checking your business out and then when you respond (either with the prices or without) she promptly ignores you. There are a couple of things going on in the background that we usually do not take into consideration which I would like to point out to you.
Brides are really burdened with their own expectations on planning their weddings. They don’t “need” all the fun stuff (they actually only need 5 things for the marriage to happen of which only one vendor type –the officiant is a purchase that has any variables to it). The girls work their plans from age 4 or 5 up until the time that they finally tie the knot. This is a really big deal for them.
I mentioned they don’t “need” your stuff. Rest assured, they will “get” most of your stuff or the wedding isn’t happening. Imagine this- a big storm hits the day before the wedding. None of the vendors, however are there, and they cannot traverse the adverse conditions to make it there (there will be no professional photographer, no chicken dinners because the staff can’t make it, not flowers, cake, etc…). the only vendor there is the officiant (they had to spend the night because of the rehearsal dinner the night before). Out of 100 Brides, how many will go forward and have the wedding? Most will cancel/postpone the days events regardless that she can get married (she has the license already, witnesses if necessary, Groom and Herself, and the officiant-everything she “needs” to make the marriage happen).
The reason(s) why she is going through all of this stress, anxiety and madness (not to mention bringing many of us along for the ride) is simple: While she doesn’t “need” all the fun party stuff, she is going to get it because A) She wants to out-do her Sister’s Wedding B) She wants to impress someone (mother in law, a favorite uncle or aunt, etc… C) She is trying to be different and unique from her friend’s wedding. These are the most popular reasons why at least. Simply put, she has a deep emotional need for perfection or near perfection and she not only does not know how to hire the “perfect” vendor, but she is very un-focused on hiring this person.
Many times she will have a “wedding-planning” seizure and send out 50 emails. We start getting back to her and she will be bombarded and many times may have already found a vendor she liked because they responded to her immediately or near immediately. You have all experienced the Bride who went with you because you simply answered her quickly. Believe it or not, that allows her to trust you more.
Other times we answer her with something that is too “salesy” which turns her off and puts her into motion checking out a different vendor. If we are trying to be sneaky in “not” giving her our prices or we are giving too much information, she will shut down. The human mind is designed perfectly. Our Brains will not allow us to make a decision when we are confused. We shut down and that is when we will want to “sleep on it”. It is our job to effectively communicate and be 100% honest with our potential clients so they do not get confused. By the way- if she is asking about price, it is only because that is the only thing she knows to ask. She doesn’t know how to ask about value, differences in personalities and experience which are the things she needs to know. It becomes our job to lead her and communicate effectively those things which are very important to her.
Until Next Week, Here’s to your success!


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